‘Yachtie’ (Re)Defined


Why be a yachtie? There are as many reasons as there are people working on boats (or for those who can’t let go; ever did work on one). Herewith a quick cross-sample of just why people get onboard, stay onboard, and never stop talking about it. Select as applicable.

  1. The ‘trickle’ in ‘trickle-down economics. I turn billionaires back into millionaires. Really happy, tanned ones.
  2. My doctor told me that as there is currently no known cure for OCD the only place I might find peace would be in the military or on a yacht. And I have asthma.
  3. I’ve always loved the water but surf instructors don’t get paid shit.
  4. ‘You can’t start a fire, you can’t start a fire without a spark. This gun’s for hire even if we’re just dancing in the dark.’
    -Bruce Springsteen, Dancing In The Dark-
  5. I have a little kid, a wife, a very specialized set of skills gained while not giving a shit about the future, and diapers don’t pay for themselves.
  6. This was the nicest place I could find to:
    a) Run away from my mother
    b) Shag
    c) Make money without first going into (much) debt
    d) Just take it all in
  7. Divorces don’t pay for themselves. So I’m financing my problems with the cause. Got a problem with that?
  8. I’m an adrenaline junkie with a yachtie habit. BASE jumps, heli-skiing, moderately large wave surfing, shark diving, running with the bulls, insurance-coverage-for-madness and Go-Pros don’t pay for themselves.
  9. I met a hot girl. I met a hot guy. I met a hot girl and a hot guy.
  10. Do I have to have a reason?

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