7 Thoughts Every Yacht Crew Member Has Had This Year

1. Who’s going to drive this thing if the captain and the first mate both die in a freak bathtub accident?

2. Is it bad that I never want to see the owner again?

3. Shut. Up. Everyone.

5. What will I find to do after this job that I will be able to love and hate this much?

4. What day is it?

6. I’m too hungover to think. (You couldn’t think that at the time, but realized it later in the day while recapping your near-death experience for anyone who would listen.

7. Shut. Up. Everyone. Please. 

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