It’s always an awkward moment when the captain turns to you at the end of an interview and asks if you have any questions of your own that you might like to ask. Don’t stress. The General Alarm has got you covered. Just print out the below and read the questions off when the appropriate time arises. You’re welcome.
- Where’d you get this number?
- Do you love, really love, or absolutely love, the movie The Life Aquatic?
- When you say ‘dry boat,’ precisely which part of the boat are you referring to? Can you show me on the fire plan?
- A) Do you have a cash cannon?
B) If not, then how specifically do you make it rain?
C) If yes then what is the point of this interview? I accept the position and would like my retainer paid in single notes fired at my face starting now.
- Does the owner refer to his or herself in the third person?
- Do you like big boats and you cannot lie?
- What’s your policy on surfing during work hours: for, or very for?
- How many weeks do I have to be onboard before I’m allowed to sleep in the master cabin?
- My pet penguin only eats Chilean shrimp, lightly battered with a squeeze of Tahitian lime. Will this be a problem?
- When do I start?